Salaam brother . Does the dead know that you have visited him at his grave site , or is he aware of his visitors , ie my newphew died not long ago ( Allah Yerhamo ) is he aware of me visiting and reciting quaranic verses on his soul ? Does it reach him or am I wasting my time ??
May Allah have mercy on your nephew and forgive him.
You are definitely not wasting time by visiting the grave of your nephew. This is a practice that is clearly proven from the Holy Prophet Sallallahu Alaihe Wa Sallam. Our beloved Prophet Sallallahu Alaihe Wa Sallam would visit the cemetery of Madinah "Jannatul-Baqi" every now and then and he would also visit the martyrs of Battle of Uhud.
When you recite Qur'an and send the reward of recitation to the soul of your late nephew then it definitely reaches him and benefits him. So, you should continue to send reward of recitation and other good deeds such as Sadaqah to him and he will benefit from that.
If Allah wishes that he is aware of your visit to your grave then he becomes aware of it but if Allah does not want his to be aware of your visit then he would not know. Nonetheless, visiting the graves of your relatives is a Prophetic Sunnah.
And Allah knows best.
Mufti Ikram ul Haq
Fatwa Center of America